Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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