there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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