I am puke
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
