ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
