I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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