dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize