its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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