he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I don't deserve a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize