Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
