erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
