i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
