We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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