His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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