why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
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