never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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