i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize