You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
