she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
