Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
