My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize