Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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