my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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