spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize