the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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