I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
