one two three fourrrrnication!
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
