Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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