He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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