The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
