I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
