YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
It's never too late to be topless.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
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