HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
