do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
