Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize