when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
