How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Randomize
