I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
PANTIES FOUND
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