I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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