I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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