What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
