i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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