i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize