New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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