so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
where does the pee come out of this thing
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize
