just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
porn star boner night. come get it.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
