Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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