I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize