we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
These 25 Soulless Industries Have Been Scamming Us For Years
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
my poor anus
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead