She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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