well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
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