she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize